Sunday, August 20, 2006
Stick.
Music: All That We Needed- Plain White T's
Mood: Distracted. Hah.
Ello.
I'm actually in the midst of studying but i am effin bored of structure and bonding of molecules and friggin atoms. So here i am. Haha. And yea, i know i should post more often but these days is just plain B-U-S-Y. Hectic work and mad rushes to study. That should explain it all really.
With the trials coming up, i have just been out of touch with a few things actually. And with this, i know i should be careful not to let the things i care about slip away. I know these things of course can't be helped with my current state. However, i just don't wanna get too many morose feelings all at once. Pretty much trying to stay sober and level-headed and focusssssssssssssed. I know i'm probably not making much sense but basically, i don't wanna be encompassed with too much things and end up feeling like, well, crap.
Speaking of which, the exams = More stress for me. Whoopee. I don't even know what i should aim for coz everytime i aim, it's not like i actually get what i want or even get close to what i want. So, i shall just do my very best EVEN though my best is never enough. I just have no means of surpassing my "BEST" stage to get what i want. Thus, i shall just stick to my "best". Yeaa i'm rambling but whatever.
We didn't go to dance class this week due to shortage of allowances. It's been quite like this since we got back but i am in no position to talk about it or even sulk about it. Okay, maybe i do sulk a little but at least i just stick to the priorities like food and groceries and bloody bus tickets for piano classes.
Piano. That's another whole inchalada. Another whole problem/issue/i dont know how else to describe it. To practice is just getting too difficult but i don't have a choice. Just gotta stick to it. Stick to all my routines. Stick to doing every thing i am capable of doing while i am here.
I can assure you things have been rocky. But knowing i can get through the rocks is a much better perspective right now. And, I HOPE with whatever i am trying to do now is going to be taken into account.
So, i'm thinking this will be the last post before my trials. Thanks to everyone whose been there for me (i know its getting dramatic but just play along) and just cheered me up everytime i hit rock bottom. You know who you are. Well, as long as ur reading my post now, you've helped. And that's all that matters. Catch ya later.
xoxoxo
i spilled my heart at
6:14 PM
